***Warning - May contain TMI***

I'm going to post briefly b/c I am not feeling well at all - however, if people are considering this surgery they need to know everything that goes with it.

I'm still feeling nauseous all the time, and eating and/or drinking seem to make it worse. It's making me exhausted and very, very cranky. I'm wishing that I had never done this in the first place. As my sister pointed out, if this were Weight Watchers and I felt this way I could just cheat. But I can't. I'll get sick. And I know that's why I chose this surgery still....

So if you've looked into WLS surgery at all you've probably heard of a phenomenon called "dumping",which by the way is a name that I hate. I "dumped" yesterday for the first time. I had gone out to a Mexican restaurant with some friends, and I ordered a quesadilla with chicken. I ate just a little bit of the shredded chicken and cheese, which I figured would be fine since basically all I've eaten the past 2 weeks are eggs, chicken, and cheese. But I guess the restaurant cheese had a lot more fat than the cheese I use at home b/c a little while later I was in my friend's bathroom. I felt like elephants were stomping on my stomach, I was sweating like crazy, I was shaking, and I didn't know which end to point at the toilet ;) I stayed that way for about 20 minutes. It was awful, and left me feeling worn out and weak.

I'm just so freakin' tired of feeling bad and not being able to eat things. When you feel nauseous, what do you do? Well, you can drink some ginger ale. No can do - no carbonation allowed. You can eat some crackers - no can do. No bread or crackers allowed. You don't keep eating and drinking stuff - no can do. Have to get a minimum in. So I could go on and on ranting about how sick and angry and frustrated I feel, but I won't.

This is why - first of all, who wants to read that? Second of all - and it pains me at this moment to write this - it will pass. I know it will. I know that lots and lots of people feel this way at this point after surgery (especially the what have I done? thing. I don't know about the nausea.) Ok, off to feel sorry for myself some more.... :)


P.S. - Added later - I wanted to add that I have yet to actually throw up since the surgery. I've wanted to - plenty of times. But I haven't. I very rarely do, as a rule. But if I had a stricture, a serious concern post-op, I would be actually throwing up everything I ate or drink. So it's good to know that's not the problem. And, by the way, I'm updating this at 11:30 at night when I should be in bed because I'm too nauseous to lie down quite yet...